I’m not angry you voted for Reform, I’m angry we live in a world that made you think it would make everything better.

I was not in the country for the recent local elections but was quickly transported back to a more dismal reality of home when I open my BBC news app and saw the vast gains made by Reform councillors. My husband and I both tried out best to relax and enjoy ourselves there was a niggly thought in our minds; back home the far right seemed to gaining popularity and that deeply unsettled us both.

Sometimes I struggle to comprehend why anybody would vote for a party headed by a man like Nigel Farage. A man who presents himself with a slimy arrogance. I watch on in disbelief as a situation almost identical to the USA begins to play out here; are there voting people watching what is playing out with Donald Trump and wanting a slice of that pie for the UK? Politics performed by a corporate puppet.

I wonder if I am not a true patriot – that I am missing a sense of national pride that is driving voters to vote for a man who so fervently spews about ‘getting our country back’ and ‘making Britain Great Again’. But that simply isn’t true; I wholly believe our country is already great, full of amazing, intelligent and (above all) kind Brits who are going to make lives better for ordinary people (because many of them already doing so). True patriotism is not looking for something other to blame for the struggles we have as a nation but looking inwards for the heroes (both local and national) who are helping normal families rebuild after what has been an incredibly turbulent decade. I would argue that incessantly spewing how awful and broken this country is the antithesis of patriotism and punching down, scapegoating those people who sit at the very bottom of social pyramid, people who should be shown kindness in the face of their despair, are not the actions of a man championing British pride.

I understand where these votes come from. I understand that rage is abundant in our society because I am also so full of rage. Perhaps I have the privilege to direct my rage towards those most affluent, those who truly are making lives worse for us regular folk, because I have experienced this group of people first hand. I have engaged in conversation with some incredibly wealthy people (mainly men) who will be directly benefitting from Reforms plans and policies. I have met and conversed with people who make more money in a year than I will make in my lifetime. These are the people we should be angry at because their wealth doesn’t come with gratitude, it comes with greed – the most is not enough for these people they want it all. Farage is merely a mouthpiece for this class of society, playing a very clever game of ‘look over there’ while stockpiling wealth right in front of us. You do not have to look very far into who sponsors the Reform party to realise who they are truly working to benefit.

Never mind the fact that the populist vote exists mainly on the premise that reform have ‘guaranteed’ an end to migrant entry to the UK (though I would argue that even if they did achieve this the affect would been almost unnoticeable to the average household). Do people really want what reform have to offer? Do people really want an end to trying to combat climate catastrophe? Are people desperate for their human rights to be taken away? Does Britain want a privatised healthcare model duplicated from the USA? I don’t think most of us do. Part of me thinks that the people going out and voting for this won’t be around to face the consequences of absconding from our national duty to tackle climate change, the pull away from our reliance on emission driving fossil fuels which will have lasting consequences for the future generations. People want a quick fix now. People want to see results quicker than ANY political party can deliver them. All we can hope is that Reform will fail to deliver on their promises (because many of them are completely baseless) and people will vote more sympathetically at the next general election.

I have kept my political opinion to myself online because I know that adding a voice to the already divisive narrative might not be useful, but I don’t think now is a time to be quiet. I have a daughter to think about, whose life will be impacted more by the choices made by a current or near future government than my life will be. I don’t hate anyone who voted for reform, I’m not even angry if you did; I invite you to have difficult conversations because it is the only resolution. I am sick of seeing viral content from both the left and the right that is slagging the other off. We should be engaging in conversations, human to human, because that is where real hope lies. If you believe that Britain truly is broken, then this isn’t where we start. Britain is going to be made great again by people coming together. Left or right leaning, communities coming together and rebuilding society from the roots up is the only way that sustainable, fair and inclusive change is going to happen. Farage won’t be able to do this, nor any other party, but it will be made impossible by a party adamant on destroying communities and spreading hatred amongst Britain.

Above all I am hoping that any upset and anger that has been stirred up on the left is not directed to the wrong people. To your neighbour or relative voted for reform, react with kindness. Believing the lies of a very clever marketing campaign does not make you evil, embarking on one nationally does. Conversations between regular, working-class people are incredibly powerful, particularly when they take place in person and not through the anonymity of a screen. Discovering the reasons that a person voted that way might make you realise that a lot of us have a commonality; we all desperately want change. Who knows, having these conversations might make us realise that we are able to help each other directly; exchanges that might be the seedlings that will grow into strong, symbiotic communities that allow people to believe in a hope independent from populist party politics. Desperation can quickly lead to hatred. Choosing to love in the face of desperation is brave and a true act of patriotism.